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life is going to seem a whole lot longer than youd like

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im over him. i swear.
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Why does President Bush always say "freedom" instead of "liberty"?

I like Liberty better.

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i havent updated lately because i have been busy pouring so much of my life into my letters to various friends.

this is just to document that i am alive, well, and moderatly happy.

p.s. go to the TAB website and read my article!

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walking up to emma's porch, not being able to handle the extremely complex multi tasking of waving and walking at the same time and completely wiping out and doing a face dive on the steps...i still got the bruise from that...mad skilz, i know

started watching a james dean movie, 30 mins intoit, we realize, hey, this doesnt make sense, we still dont understand the plot....soooooooooo we went back and looked at the box, we were watching the SECOND SIDE of the tape, and had started the movie in the middle...mad skilz, once again

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i was listening to my cds that i havent listened to in a while today, and this song reminds me of wheels like no other....


"Wide Open Spaces" -Dixie chicks

Who doesn't know what I'm talking about
Who's never left home, who's never struck out
To find a dream and a life of their own
A place in the clouds, a foundation of stone

Many precede and many will follow
A young girl's dream no longer hollow
It takes the shape of a place out west
But what it holds for her, she hasn't yet guessed

She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

She traveled this road as a child
Wide eyed and grinning, she never tired
But now she won't be coming back with the rest
If these are life's lessons, she'll take this test


She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

She knows the high stakes

As her folks drive away, her dad yells, "Check the oil!"
Mom stares out the window and says, "I'm leaving my girl"
She said, "It didn't seem like that long ago"
When she stood there and let her own folks know

She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes
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i hate him with a passion that could bore holes in steel.

because i have no steel, my hatred is motivating me to study so hard that i will be able to look at him straight in the eyes and bore holes in his sould when i ace his two tests.

basically.

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today I walked down the hall and saw one of my freshman teachers who i love. I said hi to him, and he said hey ariel, i read your editors desk, great job. and proceeded to tell me what he liked about it. and then that the paper as a whole was great.

afterwards, when i was walking downt he same hallway, when it was empty, and all you could see were the not yet touched lions roars in piles at the foot fo the stairs becayse school hadnt started yet, i smiled.

a big smile. not a wimpy smile like you usually smile to yourself. but a big grinning smile.

it's mine. the paper, it's my labor of love, so to speak. i mean, im not just a news editor, or just a features editor, i'm an everything editor.

everything that goes in is my blood sweat and tears.

and that feeling is the best feeling in the world.

I will never have a better feeling in my heart than i do when i walk down the halls after 3 sleepless nights and see every kid i pass in the halls holding a piece of my life.

i dont think non paper kids can understand that. it just draws you in.

you cant escape, like how now that i had 2000 papers in my trunk today, the smell will never fade, and the newsprint of the 4500+ papers i handled today will never fully fade either.

im forever leaving marks on the walls of my house. it drives my mom crazy that i come home with newsprint on my hands, and then touch the walls, and leave my little black smudges behind.

in a way thats what happens with the paper. I work and then everyone gets a part of it, and remembers it.

i asked a girl at graduation if she wanted a paper. no thanks, she said, i already got one and commited it to memory. there's a story about budgets on page 15.

and even though i knew she was joking, i smiled and said, no, budgets is on page two, page 15 is fire drills.
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Your Theme Song is Beautiful Day by U2

"Sky falls, you feel like
It's a beautiful day
Don't let it get away"

You see the beauty in life, especially in ordinary everyday moments.
And if you're feeling down, even that seems a little beautiful too.
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SATs trial # 1: done
APS: done
SAT IIS: done
TURNING 17: done
SEMI: done

what next?
who knows.

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17 is old. i mean it. 16 is sweet, and the ideas of "sweet 16s" in our society almost make the age 16 seem more juvinile than it would be normally. 16 is full of new things, sure, but it's still kiddish. when you're 16, you're a teen, a kid, a highschooler. you could be 16 and be a sophmore. to be 17, on the other hand, that is something else intirly. If you're 17 there are new things, and new responsabilities, but you arent "sweet" any more. There's no more flowers and pink poofy images that come to mind at the age of 17. 17 is all cars and R rated movies. 17 is not a kid. not a teenager. but more of someone who will be an adult in a very short amount of time. In a year i will be going to college, i will be voting in my first election, i will be doing so many adult things, which 17 is just the start of. i dont want to seem nostalgic, because i am not. 17 brings on more fun for me than anything else, and im happy to say that my junior year is almost over, that i will be a senior, soon a freshman in college, and soon voting. It's just that turning 17 strikes me differently than turning any other age did. It just seems OLDER, really TRULY OLDER. Not just oh haha, another year but more of a focal turning point in my life kind of older. And i dont know what the big 1 7 will bring me, and right now, im happy with that. It just seems strange, like im at the top of a mountain, but there's so many clouds that I cant see where I'm going, and only barely can I see from where I came. 17 more than anything shows me that my life is my life. I'm not a kid anymore, and I dont mind, but now it's up to me to make my life what I want it to be. It's almost a self-imposed responsability, a new weight that I feel on my shoulders, but that no one has placed there. I just feel so grown up, so old, and it's new and exciting, and the best part is, it's mine.
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